“NEVER APOLOGIZE! QUESTION EVERYTHING!”
Never apologize! Now, I have your attention. Think about this. No apology can ever take back what was said or done. It can never be erased. “I am sorry. I didn't mean to do or say that.” Yes you did, or you would not have done it.
Just because you chose to not be conscious enough to think it through before saying or doing what you did, is not an excuse. This is not an argument. It has no value in its meaning. This is why it is so vitally important to THINK before you speak or act. If everyone would take just a few seconds to think things through and be responsible, they would not regret what they have said or done. When you apologize, you are asking for acceptance of what you said or did that YOU think was wrong. You are asking it to be excused. If the person accepts your apology, they have just given you permission to do it again.
It is very important to realize that your thoughts, views and actions will, hopefully, evolve over time. My thoughts, views and actions have changed often since 20 years ago....5 years ago...one year...one month....one week and even since yesterday. This is because I am constantly questioning everything to be sure I understand the truth and how it presents itself in the moment as I am living it.
For those out there who are doing exactly what I just mentioned, and you are questioning this... you may see how this, when turned around, applies to forgiveness as well.
I hear your panic overload screaming....” Well, what do I do then or what do I say? “ The only thing that can be done is to provide some form of assurance that you understand your error, you have learned from it and with this, you will not need to make the same error in the future. Apology and forgiveness does not change what was done. Learn from the experience, no matter what the outcome is. Then, move forward with the change in your knowledge.
Believe me, I can hear your next question already! (I have lived this too. I am no different than you.) “But, if I don't forgive or apologize....I'm a bad person......” Well, unfortunately, the same entity that told you to forgive and apologize is the exact same entity that makes you feel GUILT if you don't do these things.............religion. Any religion that makes you feel guilty or afraid is not a religion, it is a government.
When I was in University for my Pre-Medical education before Chiropractic school, I had the valuable privilege of meeting a Jewish student who was a scholar of the Hebrew language. He was incredibly intelligent and interesting. I spent many precious moments in dialog with him. One thing he told me I will remember for the rest of my life that was a turning point in my belief system. He asked me....”Do you know how many times the word FEAR exists in the christian bible, King James Version? “ Of course, I did not. He responded, “422 times in the old and new testaments together”. He then asked if I knew how many times it existed in the original translation of the Hebrew bible, and of course ...once again, I did not. He responded, “the word FEAR is written zero times in the original translation. The word FEAR is mistranslated from a word that means RESPECT, and that is only one mis-translation.”
In that instant, my world turned upside down. It was at that very moment, time stood still in my known universe, I understood that EVERYTHING must be questioned.